Quwa;*

1. Shlounkoum?!

2.How was ur day?

3. Adri be9er 3indkoum alot of questions after this post! O adri ina el questions ele ys2alhoum Bandar at the end of the post ohma nafs.houm as2latkom! SO WAIT AND U’LL KNOW! :p

Enjoy it;*

EXTRA LONG POST

…

She took in a deep breath as soon as she entered the sanctuary of her car; away from her friend’s concerned gaze and away from him. How is possible that after all these years he was still capable of driving her heart crazy? She walked in to that room d…

Hello :)extra long post, I think.. Dedicated to the anony who doesn’t understand arabic, but is reading anyways.. I tried to include as much english as I can!!________________________________—- M7ammad “Come oooooooon!!” I shouted. She came still fid…

Okay so 3ashan its the weekend am going to take advantage of it ! Heeeeerrres another post ! ;pa7ebkooooooooooooom ;*Enjoy it !P.S. Madliar i missed you ! and anonymous entay el lovely walah ;* , bluelilies keep reading you’ll see what happens ;*, and …

Anne: Well I dont know. What do you think it means ?

Msh3al: I think she ment it, yet at the same time I think she thought I was about to kiss her to she leaned forward.

Anne: Mmmm.. and what did you feel after the kiss ?

Msh3al: Honestly I dont know what I felt. I was speechless. Althought ti did feel kinda good.

Anne: How about you take an appointment for Monday?



Msh3al’s Side ~~



Why didn’t she tell me she was seeing a shrink ?

I was the one who gave her the idea. She should know that I would understand.

I need to know what she was telling Anne.

I know she must have talked about me and the kiss we shared.

I’m tired of always being confused. I need to know. I have to know. But how ?


The only person I thought to call was Nawal.



Nawal: Mdrii shagolik Msh3al.. she never told me.

Msh3al: That’s because she’s been talking to a shrink.

Nawal: Hahahahahah !!! Jenah seeing a shrink? Mosta7eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeel !!

Msh3al: Well believe it. She’s been avoiding me ever since that day. Bs she cant hide from me forever. This isnt something tiny. We need to talk about it.

Nawal: Want me to talk to her for you ?

Msh3al: La ma abeeha tfrii inah I know everything.

Nawal: I would tell her everything, bs I’ll try to drag it out of her.



Back To Jenah ~~


Bader is coming tommorow and I’m freaking out.

What if all fails and he really does find me ?

I don’t know if my heart can take it.


So the next day arrived and everything went smoothly.

That is until Nawal screwed up.




POST TOMMOROW.
I WROTE THIS ONE CUZ I LOVE U GUYS !
;***************
IT’LL BE A JUICY ONE !! ;)

Heyy !! im goona start posting from now on but im not gonna promise for daily or weekly posts coz im busy with my gpa raising thingyy ;penjoy:Dsaroona;** 1990’s at that time a wealthy man who had lots of business related ideas in mind and in the …

Quwa;*1. sha5barkoum?!2. Shloun ur spring break? :p3. Im bored! VERY VERY BORED!4. enjoy it!;* next posts betzed el actions (A)!______________________________________________________________________They got off the plane… finished all presages….Bib…

A week ago, my bathroom lamp got burned. It was a total disaster .. but a good excuse to convince my nephew that their bathroom is better than auntie Errant’s. Anyways, I was super busy this past week, so I somehow forgot to tell dad to fix my bathroom…

That same night Msh3al and I stayed up late after Nouf went to bed.

And then things got kind of awkward.

He leaned in to what I thought was something, but it turned out to be something else.

As he leaned in towards me, I leaned in too.

Before I knew it, I kissed him.

When he moved back I saw the tissue box in his hand. I felt like such an ideot.

What was wrong with me ?



Msh3al: Thank you ?

Me: I thought…

Msh3al: No just a tissue…

Me: You know what I am exhausted.. yaaaawn..

Msh3al: You just said yawn you didnt yawn.

Me: That only proves how out if it I am.. Ok nighty night byeeeee



I pulled him off the couch and started pushing him through the door. I wanted him out my house immediatly! I was humiliated. No way was I going to sit another minute with him after I did what I did.

What if things change tommorow?

I needed Anne !!

I rushed right over to her the next morning !!



Anne: Hmmm… well did you want to kiss him ?

Me: WHY DO YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO ANSWER A QUESTION WITH A QUESTION !!!

Anne: ….

Me: No… well yes…. just a little…

Anne: What about this Bader ?

Me: Oh I didnt tell you ! He’s coming tommorow !

Anne: You spoke to him ?

Me: No, my friend Nawal was in Boston and she ran into him.

Anne: Seeing Bader would only jepordise your life even more. You need calmness not drama. I think it’s best if you avoid Bader.

Me: Nawal is gonna cover for me anyways, saying I was out of town with Nouf.

Anne: Well why not make that a reality ?

Me: Nouf has school and I need to discuss it wish Msh3al which is something I do NOT wanna do right now.. seeing him is a big no no..



Bader was coming. It finaly started to hit me. He was going to be here. What if all fails and he really does see me?

Would be able to controle myself ?

What about Msh3al ?

DAMN IT !



I’ve avoided Msh3al for 2 days now.

Whenever he’d come to see Noud I’d have the nanny bring her out.

I made sure I wasn’t around.

I knew I couldn’t keep it up for long, he eventualy caught me leaving the house one afternoon.



Msh3al: Let me atleasy drop you off.

Me: I have a car thanks…



I kept trying to hide my face.



Msh3al: Yallah 3ad Jenah where are you going ?

Me: The market on ________ street..

Msh3al: Thats on my way to the gym yallah let me drop you…



That was the market on the opposit side of Anne’s office.

I was already running late and had no time to argue so I got in, but in the back seat.

When I got out of the car I looked back and he was still there. As always he wanted to make sure I got in safely.

I was already late and had to run to the other side.

The second I sad Msh3al’s car leave I bolted !

Little did I know that Msh3al had just parked a few blocks away, and caught me red handed.

That’s the thing about Msh3al.. he knows me so well. He can even spot the tiniest little things.


He stayed out waiting until my session was over and saw me leave.

As always he has to get to the bottom of everything.

He got out of his car, and starting his investigation.

He gave my name at the reception and they led him straight to Anne.



Anne: May I help you ?

Msh3al: Yeah… I have a problem…

Anne: Yes ?

Msh3al: My ex wife kissed me and I need to know what that means.

Rashid: Sometime next week but im only staying there for a course Me: how many weeks is your courseRashid: One month and a halfMe: And Im guessing you joined this particular course to be closer to Lola?Rashid: Why else?Me: ANA?!Rashid: akeedMe: hahaRas…

She left his office feeling disoriented; she was supposed to have no feelings for him, and he was supposed to be in love with her, so she was, atleast in theory, the one with the upper hand, but why was she feelings so confused? She walked back into he…

Me: Meshoo I need to talk to you about something….

Msh3al: You ok ?

Me: No not really… Umm latley I’ve been having dreams abotu Bader.

Msh3al: 6yb thats normal.. since you miss him and all…

Me: Yeah but yesterdays dream was way freaky. Remember when i went to the bakery? Well as I waited I dozed off… And I had a small dream about Bader.. He was the owner of the bakery.. and then the next morning after the birthday.. he left me a cupcake on the doorstep..

Msh3al: How how long have you been having dreams about him ?

Me: Uhhh a month…

Msh3al: Jay I know your gonna hate what I have to say but why not talk to someone ?

Me: I’m talking to you.

Msh3al: No I mean a professional..

Me: No way.. shrinks are for crazy people..

Msh3al: It was just a suggestion..





Why?? Why?? Why??

Why is this happening to me?

Why cant he just leave me alone?

He’s out of my life now so why is he now haunting me in my dreams?

He’s the one who left me !

I should be in peace now!

He should be the one with the dreams !

I still can’t believe how my life has turned out…

Msh3al let me go so I could be with the man I … umm loved?

And he let me go…

So now here I am..

Divorced.

And all alone.

Bs aham shay I have Noufy.. wallah mdri wsh asawi min ’3airha. 7beebty !

But the most Im gonna take out of that day is that Noufy had fun..

She’s the jewl of my eye.. if she’s happy then thats all I need !



A few days passed by and I’d still been dreaming about Bader..

I couldnt take it anymore..

I decided not to spread the word… I decided to go see someone.

I was always against shrinks.

Talking to a stranger about all my problems. But if it’s what’s gonna get Bader out of my head then its what I got to do.



Me: So you came here all the way from the UK ?

Anne: Yes thats correct.

Me: Aha so tell me a little bit about yourself.

Anne: Ummm…

Me: Oh Im sorry .. I’m new at this …

Anne: Your nervous its ok.

Me: Ok so what do you wanna know ?

Anne: Why are you here Jenah ?

Me: Well latley I’ve been having dreams.. ALOT of dreams about this guy…

Anne: I need you to take me back to the past..



I told her about everything. My marriage with Msh3al. My affair with Bader. The divorce. How Bader broke my heart. Nouf. Every little detail. I was surprised how I could do all that in a one hour session.



Anne: What do you think you should do ?

Me: I was hoping you could tell me that.

Anne: I’m not here to provide you with the answers Jenah. I’m here to help you find them.

Me: Well Im blank.

Anne: It’s not that simple. One session wont allow me to help you.

Me: Oh so Im supposed to come here everyday?

Anne: Thats entirly up to you.

Me: I’m just scared.

Anne: What about ? That you might actualy figuire out what you finaly want ?

Me: Maybe.. I dunno…

Anne: I cant force you to do anything Jenah. But if you’d like, I could see you this time tommorow.

Me: Let me sleep on it.



Why is it so easy to open up to shrinks than it is to our family or friends?

I actualy felt comfortable talking to her.

I was kinda hoping one session would do it all.. but I guess its gonna take more than that.

But what did she mean when she said “…finaly what you want” ?

Was she talking about Msh3al or Bader ?

Or maybe someone else ?

The next afternoon I decided to go and see her.

I went to see her every other day for the next two weeks.

I’ve started to feel at ease when I was around her. Like everything was going to be ok. But the peoblem was when I left her office.

I felt like a wreck since the dreams have started.

Sometimes I would pick up the phone and start to dial his number. But I’d come to senses and hang up.






Msh3al and I were friends. We’ve left the past behind and moved on.

But I dunno why I did what I did…

I asked him out to dinner.

I didn’t know wether it was a date or just dinner as friends. All I know is I wanted to go out. And he seemed like the perfect company.



Msh3al: This is weird..

Me: What is ?

Msh3al: You and me out to dinner…

Me: So?

Msh3al: Our favorite little romantic french restuarant.

Me: Oh…

Msh3al: No no dont get me wrong. Bel3ax.. either way I was eventualy gonna ask to go out with you..

Me: Ummm…

Msh3al: As friends ofcourse…

Me: So how’s work ?

Msh3al: Really ?

Me: I dunno this is kinda awkward..

Msh3al: Jenah.. look at me… It’s me and it’s you. Us. Nothing can ever be awkward between us.



It felt good.. and kinda right being out with Msh3al that night.

I needed a night.

Besides he was the father of my child, so nothing wrong with the two parents having dinner right ?

Anne said that I missed Msh3al and wanted to re-connect with him, but on a ground level.

She said I needed to establish a stronger relationship with him, since he’s Nouf’s father and all.



The weird thing was when Msh3al told me he was going out on a date with his friends sister.

Ok.. isnt that kind of weird/gross ? Well to me it is !

Was a jelouse ?

I dunno. All I know is that I did NOT like the idea of him dating.

Anne said it was jelousy.

But there is absolutly no reason for me to jelouse right ?

Were HAPPILY divorced.

He can go off and get married for all I care !



Msh3al: Ok so how do I look ?

Me: You came all the way over here to get my approval on your clothes ?

Msh3al: Yallah 3ad Jenah I’m metting Jude in half an hour !

Me: Haha its kinda similar to my name !

Msh3al: Aha yeah ok. So do I look ok ?

Me: Uff yeah you look fine !



I crossed my arms and gave him my back.

He tried asking me what was wrong but all I did was shrug.

For some reason, that night, I really felt like calling Bader.

The only problem is I know I would regret it in the morning.

I met up with Nawal the next afternoon.

She was in Boston with Jamal for a month.

She wanted to take a buisness class there.

Turns out Bader was working there, and she ran into him a couple of times.

He would ask about me.

He also begged for my number but Nawal wouldnt.

She said he was coming back to visit his dad for a week and that he wanted to see me.

My heart starting racing.

I didnt want him to come back.

Anne was finaly helping me get passed him.

Him coming back would ruin everything.

Nawal comforted me telling me that she’ll cover for me saying that I was out of town with Nouf.

I love this girl ! She’s always there for me when I need her the most.

That same night Msh3al and I stayed up late after Nouf went to bed.

And….

Quwa;**Shlounkoum?!1.IM IN LOVE! Not inlove inlove ;p Im inlove with youm el 5ames ;p2. mistakthir ine 3isht ba3dik fe hana wala sima3t O ’6ayigik ine sa3ed?!3. 3ajbatkoum el story?! :p4. kal 3ada 6awfaw badliyat ;pEnjoy it ;**_________________________…

Hehe…
You dont really think I’d rush my story now do you ?
*sigh* If only you readers would wait just to see the next post and what it had to hold.
Anyways enjoy this post..
I know I haven’t been posting alot. It’s not that I don’t want to.. bl3ax I SO want to..
I’m supposed to graduate in 2 months. But I wanna graduate NEXT month.. so that I can quickly start my summer corse. So I’m working my butt off right now.
I really wish I could post everyday like I used to and believe me I’m trying! But please understand that it’s not intentionaly.
Please dont think that Im a bad blogger… I dont mean to disapoint you guys..
I love you all so much and writing these stories is what I love to do !
I would never rush any of my stories !
I have a post for you all.. its a long one. I will start writing it in a bit.
Inshallah it will be posted after midnight.. cause I have this wedding to attend to at 10. Ufffff !!
Im so sorry if I dissapointed any of my readers.. please forgive me…
I will try and post as often as I can.. but for now bare with me.

I have absolutely nothing worthwhile or interesting to say today, so please enjoy some adorable puppy pictures instead…

…

I demand more comments!!! :)Was it possible that he had feelings for her? She thought as she looked at her self in the mirror one last time. When they were together he made her feel like she was the only woman in the world, until he cheated on her. She…

Heeey !Good neeeewws guys am doing great eb my exaaams thanks 7ag kil ele they assssked ! w wished me good luuuck , wallah a7ebkom ;$Enjoy the post !;*—-” OH MY GOD , French croissants are the love ! ” Jana said as she munched her fresh croissantYous…

I have always preferred a couple of true, close friends over having a lot of sort-of friends/acquaintances… you know, people you count as friends, but dread seeing them? Go out of your way to avoid them if you see them out in public? Bitch and moan a…

Every single curve my hand created ..                                   &nbsp…

Quwa;*

1. ma 3indi siwalif ;p

2. EXTRA EXTRA LONG post!

3. enjoy it;*

6awfaw badliyat I didn’t check ;p

_______________________________________________________________________

He closed his eyes tight

Shasawi

Shasawi

Shasawi

An6ira ydig?! …

Quwa;*

1. Bagrig 3alaikoum shway bas u have to read it to understand!

Lama el yahil yikbar O ohwa yisma3 oboh ygoola ina ohwa fashil O ’3abi, ra7 yikbar ma 3inda thi8a ib nafsa, ma ydafi3 3an nafsa! ma y7ib yi7tak bil nass! Hatha bil ’6ab6 ele ga3id …

After only a few days, I have realized the most valuable aspect of being a dog owner – it totally gets me out of my own head and into reality…. living in the moment I suppose.Since I got the new dog, I have been so busy with her that I literally don�…

You guys hate me !! I know I know !!
I was sick .. I had bad food poisoning ;s
Anyways I’m all better now so here’s a juicy post for you all !!
I love you !!
;*******************

Two Years Later…

Me: It’s her 3rd birthday for god’s sake how could the cake not be here yet !!!

Msh3al: Jen relax I’m going to call them now and see what’s taking them.

Me: I arranged a meeting with them a month ago !! And they can’t even bring the cake on time !!

Msh3al: Hello…. yes hi I’m calling on behalf of Jenah Al-Flani…. mm hmmmm…. so how long would it take ?……… no we can’t wait that long tha party is in an hour….. alright…. thanks….

Me: So ?!

Msh3al: Ummm it’s gonna be a while…

Me: What do you mean it’s gonna be a while !!!

Msh3al: Ok calm down… they are just running a bit late.

Me: No… the guests are waiting.. 7aram no.. I’m going to get the cake.

Msh3al: Jenah…

Me: I’ll be back as soon as I can.




He’s always there for me. In the past two years we”ve managed to become really good friends. He lives just a few minutes away, so he can come and see Nouf whenever he wants.

Everything was going so well. But what about Bader right ?

Ever since that night I’ve tried contacting him but his phone would be disconnected. Didn’t take him long enough to do that huh?

I just wish he could have explained to me what the hell was going on inside his head. He always gave me mixed signals. I never knew what his intentions were. One minute I’d think I know, then the next I’m completly cluless.

Two years and NOTHING from him.

It’s not like I haven’t tried. I’ve been on a couple od blind dates and I’ve dated this guy for about three months but we broke up.

I herd a couple of times that Bader was back in town and was looking to visit me but I ignored.



Me: What do you mean it’s not ready ?!?!

Cheif: I’m so sorry miss but –

Me: NO BUT !! I WANNA SPEAK TO THE OWNER !!

Cheif: Miss this is a newly opened buisness please…

Me: It’s my daughter’s 3rd birthday !! No I will not just let this go !! I made this order a month ago !! You know for a newly opened buisness you sure don’t stick to your word ! Now where’s the owner !!

Cheif: Ummm.. he won’t be here for a while..

Me: Well then I’ll wait..



I gave him a huge smile and sat down.

Waited………

And waited ……………

And Waited ……………………



Me: OK WHERE THE HELL IS THE OWNER IT’S BEEN AN HOUR ALREADY !!!































































































Bader: Still with the temper I see…

Me: Bader…

Bader: Hey Jay.

Me: This is your bakery ?

Bader: Haha you seem surprised.

Me: Well it’s not everyday you see a lawyer open up a bakery..

Bader: Ah but you see I still am a lawyer AND I own a bakery…

Me: But why a bakery ?

Bader: My mom always wanted to open up a bakery.. she passed away a couple months ago..

Me: Oh my god Bader… I’m so sorry…



I came closer to try and comfort him but he took a step back.



Bader: Yeah… she was amazing in the kitchen. I found alot of her own recipe’s.

Me: And you wanted to make them…

Bader: Yeah, so anyways what’s the problem ?

Me: Oh you know what forget it… I gotta get going anyways…

Bader: Jenah what is it ?

Me: Well it’s Nouf’s 3rd birthday and I came here a month a go to have a cake customized and well they don’t have it ready…

Bader: Y7lelha Nouf… allah y5aleeha lek inshallah… Mmmm about the cake I’m so sorry.. I can have a cake ready for you in two hours, how does that sound ?

Me: The birthday is taking place right now.. the cake is already an hour late of skedual. Really it’s ok I’ll just take a couple od cupcakes and light em’ up.

Bader: Jay I’m so sorry.. I feel so bad.

Me: It’s ok.



He went into the kitchen to get someone to box a few cupcakes. The second he was out of my sight, I ran out.

I couldn’t handel seeing him. God knows how I remained calm during those few minutes.


I passed by Basken Robin’s on my way home and bought a huge chocolate icecream cake. I know it wasn’t perfect, but the most important thing was for Nouf to make her birthday wish and blow out the candels.

The party ended at 9 and I was exhausted. Nouf was beat, she wouldn’t take a breath once. She was the center of attention all day. Running around and playing with all of her friends. This is what a mother lives for. Seeing that million dollar smile on their babies.



The next morning I woke up to find a little treat on my front door. A little velvet box, and inside it was a mini vanilla cupcake. There was a card too, which read: “I know their your favorite.”

Do you blame me if I smiled ?

It was sweet.. but that did not mean I was going to see him again.

Why is it that no matter what happens he’s always in my life ?

I licked a bit of the frosting ontop then threw it in the trash.



As I do every morning, I checked my email with a cup of tea.

I recieved an e-mail…



I had my reasons. I know you must probably hate me now, but trust me I hate myself more for letting you go. That was the biggest mistake of my life. Your probably rolling your eyes ight now right? Well you have every right to. I broke your heart, and I’m so sorry. Jay you have no idea how sorry I am. Your all I think about, every day and night. Damn I sound so pathetic right now, and your cracking a smile right now. I know ya’..
I know I have no right to be writing you this e-mail but I had to. I promised myself I wouldn’t contact you personaly, but after seeing you yesterday I couldn’t resist.
Everytime I see you… you just keep getting more beautiful.
Now I have a favor to ask..
I want you Jenah… Leaving you was a mistake! And god I wish I could take it back!
Your the one Jenah! It’s you!
Can I ask for one more chance ?
Is it even possible?
Just give me hope.. hope that maybe.. someday.. I just want hope.
And I don’t care what it takes !
This time I’m gonna fight for you!
I lost you once and I wont lose you again!
I love you… I never stopped loving you…

IM SUPER DUPER BORED AND CANT GET ANY SLEEP SO IM BLESSING YOU WITH A THIRD POST ;;)!! DONT YOU JUST WANNA COMMENT?;p YES ?YES…?THEN PLEASE DO :( !!I hope ur enjoying it !! xxwent to my place o we sang karaoke and what not , ba3dain there was on…

TO A FRIEND THAT HELPED ME A LOT ;*  TAAALAA THIS ONE GOES OUT TO YOU :*Saif opening the closet door and inside were the most adorable creatures ever!! A golden collie and a small New Yorker A.K.A toy Chihuahua with a pink ribbon tied around his n…

Quwa;*
Shlounkoum?

1. Shloun ur mid terms so far?!

2. uff mali 5lg adris!

3. ele mo faham shay bil story ys2al!! :p (7asait nafsi a teacher ;p)

4. imdal3atkoum ib hal story kil el posts EXTRA LONG! la7a’6taw? :p

5. imdal3atkoum bil posts el 6wal d…

I wouldn’t call my self a fashionista, but I’m someone who loves observing. I love looking at how people put things together; you and I might have the same Chanel handbag, or Louboutin heels, but our interpretation might be different.Also, I must confe…

أحياناً نشتاق من لا نعرفهم و لم نسكنهم في يومأحيانا نشتاق أحدهم حد البكاءحد الفجيعة التي تـُصنمنا أمام أنفسناأمام مشاعر لا يفترض بها أن تس…

Saif offered his hand and that was an offer my heart was in no position to refuse, I locked my fingers with his , like I always I felt a rush . I became accustom to the wave of warmness when our hands were in contact. I love holding his hand in public …

Quwa;*

1.IM REALLY BUSY!

2. shlounkoum?!

3. Hal part ham fe 7achi, mako action bil 8i9a lal7en la2ana abekoum tit3arfoun 3ala el characters!

4. what do u think about the story so far?!

5. I didn’t recheck the post so 6awfaw badliyat :p

6. EXTRA L…