This is just a random post.. but its one of the most personal and painful posts I’ve written..________________________________________ The day when your best friend becomes a stranger,you can’t and you won’t describe her as your enemy because your loya…

I closed my eyes at the red light, allowing the music to transport me back in time, 3abdelmajeed’s voice taking me back to a place I no longer recognise,3alay ken ilzemaan 3endik tewagafNesait ina ifteragna gelt 9ayyafThe car behind me flashed its l…

Sorry for this being short, I’ll try to post later tonight :*Saif: PING!!!Saif: I need to see you…7ala: I love you SaifSaif: I love you too, my life without you is impossible, I don’t care about anyone else, all I want is you…I opened my eyes to …

To Anonymous that asked me this…

okay yes am a chatter so am going to explain the guy am with:
he would talk to me for 5minutes one day saying he’s busy bla bla
he would talk to me for 3hrs or more n be all i love u n cuddly

he’s not moody he’s always happy….7laylahw he’s not the type of guy that is 7ail bossy ya3ne ana a3nad mena :p

like i wear whatever i want n go out men doon enna i have to call. etc w marat he would dispear for 2 weeks then call me! what do you think?


Ok.. umm so your saying that one minute he acts like a boyfriend who cares and all, then the next he acts like he doesnt give a shit? Mo marrah mehtam feeki y3ni? Cause thats what I got from what you said.

If that’s the case, then I say take time to think about it all. I mean if someone’s relationship mood with you is on and then off, its not right. Cause if he really does love you and care, he would make time for you. He would put aside everything to be with the women he loves. As for him disappearing all of a sudden and then coming back after 2 weeks. What the hell !? L2 ’3ala6 kitha.. w 7aram ysawi feeki kitha. He’s not treating you right this way. It seems to be he’s messing with your mind. Im not saying he’s cheating, we dont really have proof on that, bs Im saying that it looks like he’s kind of using you. Being all sweet when he wants to be and being an ass when he wants to be. If someone loves you they would never even think to hurt you, 7ata not even think about it! Im sorry but from what youve told me I dont like the guy. He has no respect for you, and he’s beneath you. You can do so much better. I cant tell you what to do, this is your life and your heart. But if I were you, id take time and think. Id think about how the future would be with him. What situations we’d come across, and stuff like that.
He is messing with your emotions. Be with someone you DONT have to complain about. Someone who gives you security. This guy *laughs* sorry bs.. he’s not the right guy for you. I really do hope you make the right decision. I hope this helps :)
If you need anything else, lemme know ;**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We were on the phone one night and all of a sudden a fight began. I honestly dont remember what we were fighting about since it was such a long time ago. All I remember is me yelling at him, he made me so angry. I remember sitting on the head of the bed just grasping onto the bed sheets. Any tighter and i would have torn it.

Here’s what I remember…



5aled: Uffff 5ala9 ya Dina !!!!! Wallahi 7atta my ex was never like you !!!!!



His ex was never like me? What exactley did he mean by that?

I’ll tell you what he ment. He ment that his ex was better in situations like these. Basicly he’s saying that she was better in a way.. it hurt me. Y3ni why bring her up? Why? Shm3na?



Me: NA3AM ?!

5aled: … Im sorry wallah Im sorry I never ment to say that.. Doody walla Im sorry.

Me: Oh your sorry huh ? Never ment it to come out?

5aled: 7beebty inti wallah I would never mean to hurt you…

Me: Well you did… and the fact that you were thinking of her while we were arguing hurts even more. How could you still be thinking about her? Why the hell would she be in your mind right now ?

5aled: I dont know wallah I dont know …. please Im so sorry forgive me 7beebty.. I feel really bad !

Me: YOU FEEL BAD !!! YOU!!!!

5aled: Your right, Im sorry. Just please forgive me.

Me: I dunno 5aled…. I wanna hang up. Lets just call it a night.

5aled: La Doody please stay!

Me: Stay for what? Tell me for what? I have nothing more to say to you right now. We’ll talk tommorow. Right now I feel so much anger that I actualy wanna strangle you!

5aled: Afa you would do that to me?

Me: 5ALED ABADAN MO WA8TIK AND YES I WOULD DO THAT TO YOU !



Why bring up his ex? I mean why? How could she pop into his head like that while we were arguing? What was he thinking? “oh how “” never used to be like this.. she used to be like blah blah” That was exactley what he ment when he told me those words.

He was comparing us! I was being compared to his galelat adab ex girlfriend! How could he just not think and say something like that to me?

He really hurt me! I cried so much that night.

He wouldnt let me hang up. I really wanted to just shut the phone in his face but Im not that kind of person. He hates it when people shut the phone in his face. So I just stayed on and listend to everything he had to say. I wanted this night to end so bad, so what did I do?

I switched to happy and told him that I forgave him. I said whatever I had to say just to get him to hang up the phone. Until this day I remember it so well. Until this day my anger still lives.

That was our first huge fight.

But it wasnt how I wanted it to go. Im not saying I like planning fights or anything. But wasnt this supposed to be saved for like I dunno, the 10th fight? This was our first fight! Agh! Why couldnt we have fought about something a little first grade like crayons or something? :”(



Now please forgive me my amazing readers but I’m not really feeling it today.. Im in such a bad mood. I feel so numb. Its been a while now, whenever I read anything dealing with love or romance, or even see it I feel nacious and just wanna throw up. I dont know…

Mdri wallah wsh feeni ;s

Tommorow I’ll post inshallah.

I hope you all had a wonderful Eid with your families. :)

6IFAT ELKAHRABA !!!Wel fuse box kila igol on el nasaaabbb!W la internet la tv la 3amaaattttt 3aiiin!3ala golat shoosha: Nakser el kha6er ;p ma en3arref 7ag el mo6ar;pShdaaa3wa? Kilman 6afya 3indihom elkahraba sh7aaagggggaaaaa ! Wana w flashlighty in7oo…

3eedkum mbarak everyone, I’m sorry I haven’t been updating for a while, it seems like I have no clue where this story is going, so I thought that if I ignored it for a few days something might pop up into my brain, but so far I’ve got nothing.. let’s h…

Kl sana w enti 6yba :)

That going to out to each and every one of you ;**

Have an amazing 3eid !

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two weeks later he was here. He was finaly here. I was finaly going to see him. To hug him. To hold his hand. I just couldnt wait!

We planned everything. We were gonna meet at a Cafe called Senses. You remember it right? The cafe where I first saw Fai9al ;s

I never told him it’s where me and him went on our first date, the reason I didnt though was because I wanted to make new memories there.

Before I left the house I went and told my mom that I was all ready to go, and strangly she didnt give me a curfew. I was happy, she trusted me completly.

I was nervouse the whole ride over. See when I’m nervous my heart races so fast that it skips a beat. I am not joking, it seriously does.

An hour before meeting him I went and had my hair done. Not something too wow, I just blow dryed my hair. My makeup was natural, I never apply too much. I stuck with mascara and lipgloss. I have to say I looked super cute.

I walked into the cafe and made my way up the stairs. Remember those in wall tables? Thats where he sat waiting for me.

I was so scared so nervous… so EVERYTHING!! I mean this was the first time I’ve felt this way about anyone. I didnt wanna screw anything up. I stopped a few inches away before he could see me, took a deep breath and sat down.



Me: Hey

5aled: Ahlain

Me: Yeah..

5aled: Kefik ?

Me: Mm hmm…

5aled: Why are you shy ?

Me: Im not

5aled: Really ? Well then why are you sitting all the way at the edge of the table?

Me: …..

5aled: Ok….



Y7lelo he reached his hands out and pulled me close to him until our bodies touched. I got goosbumps the minute he touched me. My heart started racing all over again! I started to blush.



5aled: There thats better.

Me: So wheres my present ?



My sweet 16 had already passed so did his 18th birthday. I have to tell you about it. My cousin praticly sabotaged it… well she tried to. But I would never let anyone ruin it for me. So I just danced the night away and ended up having one of the best nights of my life.

I dont know what I ever did to 3aysha, remember her? My cousin that I was so close with. I told you I would tell you more about her later on.

Anyways it was a masquerade party. I was “little miss vixen” aghh I looked so hot !!! My hair was curled up and my makeup was so aghhh I cant even explain how amazing it was!!

Moving on.. I keep saying those words alot latley huh ?

So 3aysha didnt know any of my friends except maybe one or two so I invited two of her closest friends so that she doesnt feel awkward or anything. Sweet of me right ?

Everyone was dressed according to the theme, everyone that is except for 3aysha and her two friends. They walked in all slouchy with their fake smiles. They handed me my presents with absolute coldness. I ignored that, it was my night after all and I was not gonna let anyone bring me down.

The whole time they were sitting slouching down on the chair. They didnt even bother to get up and dance for a couple of minutes. Neither did they talk to me. I tried getting them to dance but they said that they were not int he mood and too tired. I mean what kind of people do that? So so SO rude! You know I was the one that threw 3aysha her surprise sweet 16 dinner ?? I was the one that bought this huge cake. I was the one that made reservations and actualy fought with the manager to get a VIP table! I did all this for my favorite cousin whom I love. And what does she do? Just slouch down on the chair like a child. I was furious!

After that night she never spoke to me. I had no idea what I did wrong? What happend? She was being selfish and cruel !

You’ll get to know more about what happend between us later. Let’s get back to me and 5aled now :D



Me: So wheres my present ?

5aled: Right here.

Me: Gimme!

5aled: No.

Me: 5ALED!



I tried to grab the present beside him but he just kept pushing me back.



5aled: Hadi hadi ya bnt !

Me: Hmmf !

5aled: La .. la tz3aleen.

Me: Too late z3lt.

5aled: 7beebty inti.. here.

Me: Hehe



I opened it and found a necklace. It had these three hearts. A big one then a medium one then a teeny tiny baby one. DIAMONDS! Agh I was so happy… not what I expected or kinda wanted bs still it was from him so I loved it.

He then opened his present. I got him a LV black leather wallet. It was gorgous! Men mostly have two options for wallets. Its either LV or Gucci. I for one hate Gucci and everything about it. I find that LV has better stuff for men.



5aled: You happy now ?

Me: Very.

5aled: Hatha aham shay..

Me: Umm are we gonna order or what ?

5aled: Anything you want.

Me: Im not really that hungry ((I was actualy REALLY starving)) so why dont we just order dessert or something.

5aled: Ok what do you have in mind ?

Me: Mmmmm chcolate souffle.

5aled: Oh…

Me: Whats wrong ?

5aled: It’s just that… I dont like chocolate.

Me: WHAT ?!!!!!!!!

5aled: Shhhh lower your voice.

Me: How the hell could you not like chocolate are you crazy !!

5aled: Its disgusting.

Me: WHAT!!!!!

5aled: Shhhhhhh your gonna get us kicked out !

Me: Sorry but were gonna have serious problems .

5aled: All cause of chocolate ?

Me: Yes all cause of chocolate !

5aled: 6yb how about this… I’ll try it. I wont promise you anything right now.. bs 3ashanik I’ll try to like it.

Me: Awwwww your so sweet.

5aled: And what do I get ?

Me: Ha?

5aled: We have to compromise …

Me: Yeah…… I dont think so.

5aled: I just did something for you so now you gotta do the same.

Me: Not necessarily.

5aled: Ooo your evil.

Me: Badri…

5aled: Oh so you know you are huh ?

Me: Angel by day, devil by night baby. ((then i gave him a wink and an evil smile))



Two hours later I left. I know my mom didnt give me a curfew bs still I had to show her some respect and not take advantage of her.

Once I was home I ran into the 9alah and told her everything! She was happy for me.

5aled didnt have a car here, he had one back in Riyadh. He usualy ships it when he’s in Jeddah but this time he didnt. Meaning his friend would have to pick him up. Meaning I would have to wait until his friends got bored of him and drop him home.

I missed him. I just wanted to talk to him, to hear his voice, I wanted it to be the last thing I hear before I sleep.

He finaly called me, at 12 am. Yeah it was kinda late but I didnt care. I waited!

I know we’ve just been dating for a short time but the way he made me feel… safe and loved. Wait.. did he love me? I dont wanna get my hopes up too high. It Seemed that everytime I do, I end up getting hurt. Slow down girl, slow down. Take a breath.

What I loved most was our late night phone calls. We would both cuddle into bed and talk. I loved that. The last thing we’d hear was eachothers voices.

What I loved even more was that sometimes when we’ve said goodnight and hung up, he’d call again to hear my voice one last time.

The night was perfect.

We had our hands interlocked the whole time. Every now and then he’d kiss it. His touch gave me butterflies.

He was still in the city for another week. We had all the time in the world. I already spoke to my mom asking her if I could see him every other day for the next week and she agreed. Y7lelha mama wallahi she was an angel. Being so understanding and letting me be free, with limits ofcourse.

But the next night.. me and 5aled had our first huge fight. He said something that really hurt me. Something he should have never said. Something that he should have never even thought about.

Something to do with his ex… :”’(




~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Have an amazing 3eid my beautiful readers. I really hope to get more feeback from you. Very few are commenting. I know all of you read and like what you read but I would really like more feedback, it would really help booste me up and encourage me to write even better. I would glady appreciate that.

Allah y5alekom l ahlikom, have a wonderful day with them.

3ID MOBARAK ! :)

Previously

A: 3eyounii, 7yaaati, babyy !!

i turn around and gave him the biggest smile ever! i knew i couldnt resist him! he is just to beautiful!!

N: 7yaatii enta;*

——————————————————————————————————-

Just being in his arms gave me butterflies, let alone his kissing me, la w on my neck !! which is my weak spot;$

He was so romantic he would do anything for me, when it was time for me to leave and meet up with khaltii in avenues, he didnt drop me off at the door and leave, no he looked for a parking spacee and walked behind me till i got to my table when he knew i would be safe how sweet right?

Anyways, i sat down w salamt 3ala everyone bl 6awla khaltii w her future husband w his sisters,

Khalti: so how was your friend enshalla you guys had fun;)

Najla: hehe eeh walla we did thanks etsalem 3alaich btw;p

(the rest of the table had no idea what we were talking about;p)

Khalti: zain ashwa el 7imdilla, allah esalemha

Beep Beep

Recieved
Marassii Ghorbitii;*
9:38 pm

Thank you for an amazing night 7abeebtii ;*

Sent
Marassi Ghorbitii;*
9:41pm

No sweetie thank you I had a great time with you;*
7abeebii im eating dinner now awal ma akhale9 ill msj u tc on ur way home;*

Recieved
Marassi Ghorbitii;*
9:43pm

Bl 3afya galbi ;*
Enshalla 7abeeebtii i will awal ma etkhale9een msj me ;* dont forget;(

AT LAST!!I’ve been waiting for this day since FOREVER! Happy Eid to all of you :)3eedkum Mbarak!w ta8abal allah 6a3atkumw kil 3am w intaw b 5eer :)w have fun and enjoy every single moment of this day and the upsoming non-school, non-working days ! :) …

Previously on Oh Doctor, Doctor.

“Nhayan,” he called him.

He searched for him at the back of the house but didn’t find him. He looked for him everywhere until he found him sitting on the front steps of the house having a smoke.

“So, what’s going to happen next?” Nhayan asked him.

“I don’t know,” he closed his eyes as he rubbed his cold hands together.

————————————————

“Wake up,” she softly whispered into his ear.

“Babe, five more minutes,” he hugged her tightly and continued his sleep.

“Baby, you’re going to be late,” she kissed his forehead.

“I miss your kiss, you know that. I miss a lot of things about you,”

“I miss everything about you too, but I certainly won’t get to enjoy you when you’re sleeping and I’m staring at you, waiting for you to get up, yeah?”

“Come sleep with me then,” he pulled her closer to him as she got up.

“Hamad,” she said, irritatedly.

“Nouf, just shut up,” and he kissed her passionately, pulling her onto him.

The next hour they were dressed and having their morning breakfast. For once he felt that the house was alive, due to her presence. They had fresh waffles with maple syrup and their morning coffee.

He was leaning on the kitchen counter while she was pouring the coffee into the two mugs as he admired her gracefulness.

“What?” she giggled when she met his gaze.

“You,”

“Me?”

“Yes.”

Just as she was about to leave he scooped her up and carried her to his room. They walked down the hall and into his bedroom and they both got into bed and slept in each other’s arms.

——————————————————

P.S. Sorry if it’s boring.

P.P.S. HEROINE! YOU BETTER POST SOON!

P.P.P.S. I’m sure you know that Mama Z opened up a new blog. If not, it’s zuzzypie.blogspot.com

P.P.P.P.S Love you all :*

I’m very very very very very sorry…bas i was too pressured w too tired w toooooooooooooooo busy :p w i have a list of things i have to say before u guyz read this post..
1) LOVE ;*: I LUV U WAAAYIIDD WAAYIIIDDD! W I MISS U ALOT! I dunno if ur reading this bas it3arfeen lama ur used to someone soo much? well i’m used on seeing u on blogger whenever i log in..a7is something is missing wallah ;* Thank u for everything..w i hope ur doing fine wherever u are :*****

2) Kiss;* mit thi7ikk 3ala ur comment :p a7is kil french teachers 5adaay ma yadroon wain allah ga6hum :p w ZAIN w Dazzy : I’M NOT DREAMING OF 7AMAAAD! WAAAIII333! AND IF I DO THEN ITS DEFINATELY A NIGHTMARE! i actually did dream of him that day :p W ONE MORE THING…I LOVE U BOTH SOOO MUCH

3) The thought of love w ACAgirl w laymoon w everyone else who commented thank u :*******

4) IKTISHAFT IKTISHAAAF 3AN 7AMAD…….i’ll tell u guyz later :p

This one is dedicated to…DAZZLIN :* THANK U FOR SUPPORTING ME :** Luv u

ENJOY :*******
…………………………..

Previously

Mshary smiled while he looked at the number calling him..he excused himself and walked ahead of her…

IFFFFFFF!! YBI6 L CHABD! LAAISH 9AAYIR WAAYID MALEEEEEEEEEEEEE8!?? LAAAIIISSSHH 9AYRA MA ABLA3A! YA3NI ZAAID WLA MARRA SAWWAHA FEENI W7NA YAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL! L7een mshary kbeer w rayyaal ya3ni..laaish chitheee?! tawwa zafni w ma36eeny speech a6wal mina! Huuuufff! ba3arif mino y7aachi! moo ohwa bi3arif kil shay ana asawii? w we’re not even officially engaged 3la golat Hala..me too lazim a3arif!

Jood Followed him…she wanted to know who is he talking to
……………………………………………………….

Zaid~

Ma raa7 a5aleech Ya JOod…ymkin i won’t get ur love..bas i won’t give up on our freindship…Bathbitlich ini ta’3ayyart..w bathbitlich ini a7ibich
…………………………………………….

Waaainnaa?! ifff waainaa i can’t see him…waayiiidd za7maa! ybi6 L chabd hal Mshaary! shda3wa 3alaik ya3ni u can turn it off 7ag yom waa7id! ma raa7 y2aath–

Jood: aaayyy!

M7ammad: hehehe..

Waaiii33! killish mooo wagtaa!

Jood: …….

M7ammad: asiiff..wallaah asiiff ma shftich…hehhee..

Jood: 7a9aal 5aair…uuhhhh 3aadi as2ilik su2aal?

M7mmaad: *cough* hehe *cough* s2laay…hehe

Jood: shithaa7ik?

M7ammad: laaa bas ath7ak 3al 9idaf ..thani marra ad3imich hahaha..jana 9aa7?

ooo 9ijj! hatha ma yadriii..

Jood: haa? ee..la 8a9di Jood…

M7ammad: Jood? *confused* ’3areeba i thought ismich Jana…

Jood:*looking for Mshary with her eyes* aha…

M7ammad: itdawreen a7ad?

Jood: umm…eee ma shft wa7id kuwaiti labis blue polo ?

M7ammad: ee shftaa…. illi kaan yet7acha bel telephone?

Jood: EEE!WAAAIN RAA7!?

shfeeha chithee mishta66aa..laykoon rifeejhaa? laughing sarcastically* ashkaara chithee ba3ad? moo mista7ya… wana 3abali inha 5osh wa7da…

M7ammad: maadrii…

Jood: huuffff! *disappointed* inzaain uhh…ma sim3at mino kaan y7achi?

M7ammad: *smirk* yhimmich?

Jood: ee yhimni! plz M7ammad goollii mino kaan y7aachi!? aw moo mino bas shino sim3ata ygool?!

M7ammad: awwal tjawbeeny mino hatha?

iffff! waayyy would it kill u if u just answer me!

Jood: *deep breath* He’s my fiance…

thalamt.ha! 6alaa3 5a6eeebhaa…shagoollaahaa L7een?





M7ammad: *deep breath* madri wallaah shgaal bas kaan ygoool 7abeebtii asiifff barid 3ugub chaam yomm…shay chithee…

Jood: *gasp* SHINO?!

M7ammad: shfeech me5tar3aa?

Jood: M7ammad int min 9ijjik?!

she looked at him impatiently waiting for him to give her an answer..tears started to form in her eyes…












M7ammad: KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAK!

Jood: *confused* shfeek? laaish teth7aak?!

M7ammaad: haha…laa bas..hahaha…6ala3taay 9aai..hahaa…9aaida!

Jood: *still confused* 9aidaa?

M7ammad: bsir3a yngaa9 3alaich wallaah…..knt a6africh..ma kaan y7achi wa7da..kan y7achy rifeejaa..hahahahaaa

Jood: WAAAYYYY M7AMMAAD! KILLISH MA YTHA7IK! CHITHEE A7AD YL3AAB BA39AAB L NAAS?!

M7ammad: hahaa…shnsawwi ba3ad…*wink* yallaah bye ya 7lwaa..

Jood:* furious*…….

he winked and walked away…while she stood there burning in her place..she cursed herself for thinking that Mshary would cheat on her…ofcourse he wouldn’t..she trust him…right?

I CAN SERIOUSLY KILL THAT PERSON RIGHT NOW! WAAAIIII33333333333! *imitating his voice* bye ya 7lwa…iffff … maleeeeeeeeeeeeeeee8! maleee88 maleee88 maaleeeeeeeeeeee8! killish ma 7abbaaita! madri shlon zaaid rifeejaa…o he made me doubt Mshaary! GOD i feel like a bitch for doubting him akeed he won’t cheat on me…its Mshary..he said he won;t leave me for nohing..plus he came to the states just to see me…he won’t be cheating 9a7?

Mshary: aahhh….joody asiif 6awwalt 3alaaich .. yallah mishaaina?

Jood: ohh Mshary… yallaaah *smile*
……………………………………

THE END! SORRY ITS SHORT WALLAH WALLAH SORRY! tawni ashtiri hdoom 3eed believe it or not i just came back from shopping :p w hatha illi Allah gaddarni 3alaaih :p NO CLIFF HANGER SEE! BAS DON\T WORRY I PROMISE NEXT POST FEE A VERY LOVELY CLIFF HANGER! (6) MUHAHAHHAA…..www shbi9eeeeeeeeeer?? tadrooon? laa? okaaay :p agooool? la maani gayla fakraaw :p BTW… M7ammad moo 5arboo6i character :p he is important just like Shaheen ;) ull have to wait to see why though :D

LUV U :**********

Hello :)I hope everyone did well in their exams!W sorry for the late post :P3eedkum Mbarak Mu8adaman :)This post is dedicated to Um 3abdallah.. “fee the word you can’t pronounce :P”w Fa6oom.. “I miss youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!”w to all my friends and lovely …

Hello :)I hope everyone did well in their exams!W sorry for the late post :P3eedkum Mbarak Mu8adaman :)This post is dedicated to Um 3abdallah.. “fee the word you can’t pronounce :P”w Fa6oom.. “I miss youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!”w to all my friends and lovely …

An extra long post for my Pretties. Love you all ;**

Elyoum youm 3arafa.. Allah yqabel do3a2kom.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~




On May 11… when everything changed…

It was late at night and I couldn’t sleep. 5aled was all over my mind. He was all I thought about. Since the day he asked me to be “his” I couldnt stop rewinding what he said…

I want you to be mine… my girlfriend… will you ?

He said it in the most softest cutest voice.

So yeah ever since that day I could not stop thinking about it. Yeah I did brush it off my shoulder but it just kept coming back. AGHH!!! I dont know whats wrong with me ;s

Anyways on May 11 it was like 2 am.. I couldnt sleep. My mom was awake and without even feeling my body I started to move.

You know when your about to do something, when your body takes controle and in your mind you just going “hey whoah what the hell ok umm where am I going oh god no Im not gonna do that” ?

Well thats how I felt.

I walked into the 9alah and sat across from my mom.

She imediatley asked me what was wrong. I didnt even say a word and she just knew! Thats my mom, she knows me that well.

Mama: 7beebty fee shay ?

Me: Ummmm…

Mama: *sigh* Alright yallah t3ali jambi.. let it out.

Me: It involvs a guy.

Mama: Aha… and ?

Me: Well nothing’s happened 6b3an cause I told him I couldnt go behind your back again.

Mama: But you are being friends with him behind my back..

Me: Mama wallah I’m sorry please dont make me feel bad. I feel it enough as it is!

Mama: 6yb Im sorry.

Me: So we’ve been freinds.. actually good friends for a while now and a few weeks ago he asked me to be “his” bs I turned him down 6b3an.

Mama: So what are you asking me now ?

Me: Im asking you to give me the permission to talk to him.

Mama: Bs your already talking to him, even before you talked to me. So why my permission now ?

Me: Mamaaaaaaaaaaaa wallah Im sorry please!!!


I started to stutter and cry.

Mama: 6yb al7een why are you crying ?

Me: Cause Im so sorry !


She leaned over and pulled me close to her and hugged me tight.


Mama: Does he make you happy ?

Me: Very.

Mama: Is he a good man ?

Me: To me yes.

Mama: Do you love him ?

Me: I dont know if Im there yet but as for now.. he’s near my heart.

Mama: Not inside it ?

Me: Not yet.

Mama: 7beebty, if the guy makes you cry like this then go be with him. Just be careful.

Me: Mama wallah? So I have your permission to be with him ?????

Mama: Haha e 7beebty yallah go call him,

Me: Wallah inik a7la um fl 3alam!! Allah la y7remni mnk ya a’3la min el nas !!! A7bkkkkk !!

I gave her a huge hug and ran straight to my room.

I grabbed my phone and dialed his number!

HIS PHONE WAS SWTICHED OFF !!! :”””(

I started to tear up again. I kept trying over a thousand times but no luck. I was so down. I knew he’d be asleep by this time and I really wanted to say yes yes yes ask me again the second he picked. I was so excited. He would have jumped out of bed hearing me say those words awal ma rad!

I went back to the 9alah and told my mom what happend and she hugged me. She told me to go wash my face and sleep. Tommorow morning I would give him the news. Sm3t kalamha w da5alt anam.

I woke up at 7:30 the next day and grabbed my phone which was ont the pillow next to me. I didnt want my phone anywhere but near me.

I dialed his number and THANK GOD it wasnt switched off!!

He answered after the second ring. Awwwwwwwwwwwwww ;***

5aled: Aloo?

Me: 5ALED !!

5aled: Hala.

Me: ASK ME AGAIN !

5aled: Ask what again ?

Me: Dont embaress me yallah you know exactley what I mean !

5aled: L2 I wanna hear it from you haha.

Me: 5aleeeeeeed !

5aled: 6yb 6yb. Will you be mine ?

Me: YES YES YES !!!

5aled: Y7belik !!!!! So what made you change your mind ?

Me: Well –

5aled: Uh doody class just started I really gotta go .

Me: NO YOU WILL STAY WITH ME SHWAY !!

5aled: 7ather 6al 3mrik.

Me: E adab !

5aled: So tell me…

Me: I went to my mom last night and told her everything. She gave me permission.

5aled: Y7lelha umik.

Me: E wallah ya7athy feeha. Bs tra I called you yesterday awal me 8alatli 6yb bs your phone was switched off !!!

5aled: E wallah Im sorry.

Me: From now on you will make sure its fully charged 24/7 and buy a charger for the car.

5aled: 7ather min 3yooni el thentain. Tmreen 3ala shay thany ?

Me: That’ll do for now.

5aled: Almhm I really gotta go the teacher is giving me a look and I think Im dead.

Me: Hahah Allah y3eenik. Ok bs call me the minute you get out of school!

5aled: Inshallah. Yallah bye 7beebty.


Wait wait.. hoooooooooold on a minute! Did he just call me 7beebty?! He did he really did !!! Ana 7beebto ? Awwwww yallah when will these 7 hours and a half end so he can call me?? 7beebto aghhhhh I miss him already !!

Finaly the hours past and he called me straight after school. I picked up after HALF of the first ring. Hehe..

5aled: Hala bl zain.. bl zain kilah!

Me: Hehe ahlain.

5aled: Kefik doody? How was school ?

Me: I had an exam today so that pretty much sucked.

5aled: Yallah 3adi inshallah you did fine.

Me: Inshallah.

5aled: I missed you.

Me: I MISSED YOU TOO !!


YA BINT!! KEEP IT TOGETHER. ALLAH YEFASHLIK!!


5aled: A55 bs mita bshoofik ?

Me: Yeah when are you coming anyways ?

5aled: In the next break.

Me: Mita y3ni ?

5aled: Three weeks.

Me: Im gonna see you right?

5aled: La t9dgy Im just gonna stay one week hanging out with family and friends and ignore you.

Me: Not funny.

5aled: Yeah I know.

Me: Dont worry you’ll learn from the master.

5aled: Mashallah wathqa ba3ad.

Me: E 6b3an !


We talked for about an hour but then had to hang up cause he has tutors from 4 till 7.

I would have to wait four hours before talking to him again. Once I hung up the phone I started missing him right away. What was wrong with me? I never used to be like this. This isnt me. What has this guy done to me?

I tried as much as I could to occupy my time. I’m a lover of DVD’s and Im not over exhajurating here but I have my very own Virgin Megastor in my room. Two glass cabinates, one filled with series and the other filled with movies. Now that I think of it, I really do need to get a third one. Theres just so many!!

I swear whenever my friends would come to see me, the minute they walk into my room they dont even say hi, they just walk straigh up to Virgin.

Once my friend walked in and bam it was right infront of her. And all she said was “oh baby oh baby” in the most seductive voice. I laughed like crazy.

At the moment I’m watching 13 series. I know I know.. goolo mashallah :)

Dont ask how cause even I cant understand it. I actualy dont forget anything. Whenever a new season comes out I never have to watch the last minutes of the the previous season cause I have it all memorised. Ma ansa wla wla wla shay!! Im keeping up with them all without a minute of confusion.

And Im not naming them by which I like the most. Their in random order.


1. Desperate Houswives

2. Mercy ((which is a better medical drama then Grey’s will ever be. No offence to those who love Grey’s))

3. Dollhouse ((recommended))

4. The Vampire Diaries

5. True Blood ((recommended asap))

6. One Tree Hill

7. Brother and Sisters ((recommended.. really amazing))

8. Lost

9. Ghost Whisperer ((I love jennier love hewitt

10. Gossip Girl

11. Private Practice

12. Cougar Town

13. Heroes



Anyways lets get back.

The hours past and he called me.

During our time apart :p I wrote a list.



Me: Listen I wrote a list.

5aled: Huh ?

Me: A list of things your gonna have to put up with. I dont want there to be any surprises in the future so Im gonna lay it all out on the table now.


(( I actualy still have the list I read to him. I stumbled onto it suddenly while I was looking for something))


5aled: Ok lay it on me.

Me: Ok here it goes. One. Im very moody. I may fj2a curse at you then smile easy again. ((no i dont have bi-polar disease)) Two. I talk alot like really alot. I tend to blab so much that it may want you to jump off the London bridge. Get used to it. Three. I like the way I am. I will not change for you or for anyone. This is me Im a package either take it or leave it. If you dont like something your just gonna have to get used to it. Four. Im very neat and tidy. If I see one thing out of plcae I will go insane and just have to fix it. 3ala gool kl a7ad, Im Monica Geller. Five. No one gets to tell me what to wear. Yeah your a guy and all and you guys have a problem if your girl wears sleevless in public. But let me tell you something. There are many diffirent styles of sleevless. El7mdelah umi rabatni zain so I know what Im doing and what Im wearing. Your just gonna have to turst me and shut up. Thats all I have so far. Any updates I’ll let you know. Understood ?

5aled: …….

Me: 5ALED !

5aled: Yeah sorry I’m still taking it all in.

Me: Good. Take as much time as you need cause I ment what I said and its not gonna change. So now do you still want me ?

5aled: Doody the first time I saw you, when you smiled at me, that smile had me. From that moment I knew I wanted you to be mine. That smile… the most cutest beautiful smile Ive ever seen.

Me: Hehe ok stop.

5aled: What are you shy now ?

Me: Maybe..

5aled: Well my little shy princess I have to go.

Me: WHAT? WHY IS IT ALWAYS YOU WHO HANGS UP GIVE ME A CHANCE Y3NI !

5aled: Wallah 7beebty I have to go. My family is sitting down for dinner now. Aw3adik 3ala6ool after I eat I’ll call you.

Me: Promise ?

5aled: Pinky promise.

Me: How can you pinky promise?

5aled: Why do you always have to hold onto the tiniest little things ?

Me: Toshay… (however you spell it)

5aled: Yallah 7beebty talk to you soon.

Me: Bye.


Awwwww isnt he adorable.. He called me 7beebty again! Aghh feek ya 5aled. You give me vertigo.

House of mirrors, I see your face
Come nearer, it’s so hot in this place I can’t hear you
I can’t breathe when you touch me
I drown and I drown and I drown

I feel like Alice falling down through the hole
Can’t stop this, going out of control
But I like it, in a freefall
That keeps going up, going up, going up

I’m so high from this love, I don’t wanna look down
The room starts to sway every time you’re around
Like the teacups at Disney, you’re making me dizzy
You give me vertigo

When I jump on the table, I spin like a dreidle
Hold on to me baby, I feel so unstable
If I’d try to drive, I’d get a DUI
You give me vertigo

( Jordin Sparks – Vertigo )

el lotion tidahenaw feeh 3ade.. bs the cream for ur feet yaaa salaaaammm !!! w reeee7ta babies ;p beautiful babies:Pta7iyaaaaaaaaaty;*

 One of my awfully                                       s&nbs…

3eedkom imbarak mo8adaman ;D o 3asakom min il 3aydeeen wil fayzeen inshallah, o inshallah yin3ad 3alayna o 3alaykom ib kil 5air o 9i7a o salamalove u;***

L 3eeD 3LaaaaiKuM MbaRaK !! As2al Allah iN Y3oDaH 3LaiKuM BiL 97aH wiL SLaMaH Snynin MdaYd :D :D !!!il 3thr 3ala il g9oor =)One sunny school day 6:30 am to be precise, my mother gave us the regular shout of our consistent tardiness. I was admiring the…

Masaaaakoum allah bil 5aaair ;*Waaaaaaay el mu6ar iyaaanin

Previously on Oh Doctor, Doctor.

…(The letter)…

I’d appreciate if this is kept to
yourself as
I’m not ready to inform every one, pity is something I’m not looking
for at
the moment my strength is supplied from their normal
life.

Thank you.

Nouf.

Another hot tear made it’s way down
his face.

———————————

There are so many
difficulties we face during our daily lives, some of them not a tad bit easy. Hamad was going
through a break up; more like bidding farewell to his soul mate. He received this letter
two months ago, meaning her bright, radiant self would no longer spread the
happiness around her after the passing of these four months yet to
come.

Just two months ago was the
first time reality had hit him that hard. Even though you see the people around
you whom are alike but you never think that this could happen to your loved ones
or your family, friends, etc.

You never think that this may happen
to you, except when it does, and this is when it hits you hard. We’re not
different. We’re the same. Whatever is written for us is how it’s going to be,
you can’t change that and it’s a fact.

Don’t
go like “I wish I could go back and change things, I would’ve done this and
that…” that simply isn’t helping you now. You have to
live the moment. Enjoy it. Love it. Live it. It’s simple, just go with the
associated flow. It’s never too late, even if it was, better late than
never, right?

Every single person has
his/her day written ahead of him. Correction: Everybody has their entire life
planned ahead of them. You can’t do anything to change how it is. Where ever
fate plans to take us, it eventually will.

He
felt his body stiffen up. He got up from his arm chair and threw the vase in
front of him and smashed it into the wall.

“Why?” he cried.

He got up and walked towards the
fire. Just when he was going to throw the letter from his hand, a hand slowly
pulled his arm backwards, taking the letter away from his hand.

“You don’t want to do that,” his brother said.

He turned around with his red eyes and tired face and
hugged him. Nhayan
hugged him back.

They both walked to the
sofa and sat down.

“She told me,” he
said patting his back while he had his face in his hands.

“When did you come?” he asked his
brother.

“I just arrived…remember you
gave me a spare key, that’s how I got in,”

“Shasawy
ya Nhayan, shasawy el7een?”

“Let her be,”

“You do realise that this is hard, do you? I have been with her every
minute of my life this past year, not physically but I have. Shloon a3eesh bdoonha? Do you know how
hard that’s going to be?”

“I
do,” her voice came from behind, “You think I don’t
know? You think this isn’t hard on me too? You think that I wanted this to
happen?” a few tears escaped her eye.

“Nouf?”

“Yes Hamad, it’s me, Nouf! Hamad, you have to move
on.”

Nhayan
got up and slowly disappeared to the back of the house.

“Inta ma ga3ed et7is bly ana ga3da a7esa! For God’s sake Hamad, stop being so selfish!” she
fell to the ground as she started to cry.

He rushed to where she was and scooped her
up. He was shocked at how light she has become and it shattered his heart to a
million pieces.
He waited for her to calm down and her breathing to equalize and headed
upstairs. He watched as her tears silently slipped down her rosy cheeks and he
laid her on the bed. He sat on the bed but she extended her hand wanting him to
join her.

“5ala9 Noufa, you just
came. Akeed ta3bana, rest 7abeebty,” he kissed her
forehead as she slowly drifted off to sleep.

He played with her hair as she cuddled next to him unconsciously. He
inhaled her smell as it burned his lungs. He longed for her smell…mostly, he
longed for her. After some time he remembered Nhayan. He got up to cover her petite body, kissed
her cold cheek, closed the lights behind him and went to look for his
brother.

“Nhayan,” he called him.

He searched for him at the back of the house but didn’t find him. He
looked for him everywhere until he found him sitting on the front steps of the
house having a smoke.

“So, what’s going
to happen next?” Nhayan asked him.

“I don’t know,” he closed his eyes as he rubbed his cold hands
together.

Eid Mubarak xo.

P.S. A million thanks to Mama Z! You ROCK!

P.P.S. Dazzy, more spoilers are on the way ;)

Zain

Allah y7ayeki t3ali 3ala Jeddah.. ra7 tnawreenha ;**
As for 5aled haha I know the three of us can cause him serious pain if he does/did anything ;p
Your adorable I love you <3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



We talked everyday for the next two months, we grew really close.

The diffrence btween us is that I dated three guys all in one year while all he had was one.

He told me about this girl Fa6ma and how she broke his heart. They were together for about a year.

Remember he went the summer before to the same camp Meeny was in ? Well while he was there he asked one of his CLOSE guy friend to keep an eye on her. That meaning to make sure she’s taken care of when she needed anything or if she wanted to contact 5aled and couldnt reach him, she would ask his friend to deliever the message for her.

This close friend of his only had Fa6ma’s email. So they contacted eachother through msn.

While they were both online, Fa6ma asked him (the close guy friend) to open up the webcam. He did.

They talked a bit and then she started to un-button her blouse.

And he didnt even try to stop her.

Although this wasnt really concidred cheating, it was under the same category.

What was really sad was that 5aled had to find out about it from one of his other friends. I mean imagine your on vacation having the time of your life with your friends and then you get a sudden unexpected call telling you that your lover has betrayed you.

How he must have felt. Heartbroken. Depressed. Embaressed. Shocked.

I was so sorry for him I wanted to do something so bad. I wanted to call her!! Aghhh I was so angry. I mean I could relate to what he’s going through. The way I felt, he felt it too.

He waited until he got back from camp and then confronted her. She denied it which made him even more angry. Lying right to his face. El mohim He broke up with her and that was the end of it.





The first time I saw him was so weird. The place wasn’t right. Looking back I actualy laugh at how silly I was.

I was 15 going to be 16 in 2 months and a half ((August 25th .. dont forget ;p)

Anyways My guy cousins and I were so bored one day that we just wanted to get out of the house and go anywhere. We had no clue where to go so we decided to cruise around in the car and see if anything pops up.

Don’t laugh bs we got so excited once we saw Chukie Cheese :$ heheh…

We felt like acting like little kids that day. We were so bored we were up for anything just to pass the time!

We all had a mini break at that time, and 5aled (who lives in Riyadh) was in Jeddah. He and his family come evrey chance they get. They practicaly lived here.

It wasnt even planned or anything bs I just called him and asked him to come.

On of my guy cousins, Zooz (his nickname) also went to camp with Meeny that summer and also was friends with 5aled. So we were worried about what Zooz would do. So I suggested we act as if we didnt know eachother, we hadnt even told anyone that we were friends. Not Meeny or Zooz, I was afraid they’d get the wrong idea due to my past and how they pushed themselves in to know everything.

The plan was that 5aled would see Zooz and act like this was all a coincidence, seeing him and all. That would lead to all of us hanging out together with one of 5aled’s friend that he brought along.

So he got there but the security guard wouldnt let him in. You know how it sometimes is, if the security guard doesnt like what he sees, he wont let you in. Agh I hate it when they think they have the upmost power.

He called me and told me what happend. So I came out and tried to talk to the guard. I insisted but he just said no flat out. I tried everything, even saying that they were my cousins but he still woudlnt budge. I gave up and told 5aled I was sorry I made him come all the way out here for nothing. He told me “hey its ok, atleast I finaly got to see you”

Awwwwwwwwwwwww !! Isnt he adorable.. ;***

That was the first time I ever saw 5aled. It wasnt the perfect way, but hey he didnt complain :D

I wanted to see him again but I couldnt risk getting caught. I was still feeling guilty about not telling my mom that he and I were friends, plus all my cousins from Riyadh were here so anyplace we meet up at I was bound to run into someone I know.

He went back to Riyadh and we continued out daily chats.

Do friends talk to eachother 5 hours a day? Cause we would talk in the after noon from like 3 to 5, and then again from 11 at night until like 2 am.

I knew he had feelings for me I just knew it. He wasnt that well at hiding them. I didnt wanna embaress him bysaying anything, so I just brushed it off my shoulder.

During the end of March my grandfather started to get sick. He spent many months in and out of the hospital. The whole family flew in and we were all by his side. I would totaly forget about everything in my life including 5aled and rush straight to the hospital after school and just sit by his side holding his hand.

Like I already told you before, I was really close with my grandfather. I was the closet grandchild to him. Secretly I was his favorite. <3

I loved him so much that when I saw him the first time in the ICU I broke down and cried. I ran in and sat by him and held his hand. I rested my head on the bead and started to cry. It broke my heart seeing him like this.

This is so hard for me to write because I loved him so much. He was more of a father to me than my dad ever was!! He was there for me more than my dad could ever be!! Just by looking into his eyes I knew he loved and cared about me more than my dad ever did !!

Im actualy crying right now..

Allah yr7amik ybooy w allah yd5alik el janah ya rabbb ya rabbbb ya rabbbb !!

Ya rbii.. ok I’m all better now. Bismilah al r7man al r7eem. Here we go.

One day when I was at the hospital, I wanted to take a breather so I went out onto the balcony. I needed someone to loosen me up so I called 5aled. We talked and he made me laugh and feel a little better.

Then he suggested we play a game.. truth or dare. I hate that game, especialy when your playing it on the phone. I find the game lame and pointless.

So he asked the first question.. one I never thought he’d ask… well not yet.



5aled: Doody… I want you to be mine… my girlfriend… will you ?

Me: ………. Aha….

5aled: You there ?

Me: Yeah…

5aled: So ?

Me: So how’ve you been ?

5aled: Doody you didnt answer my question

Me: What question ?

5aled: You know what 5ala9 never mind.

Me: 5aled…

5aled: Na3am ?

Me: I cant..

5aled: Yeah…

Me: It’s not that I dont want to but I dont want to be with someone behind my mothers back. I cant lose her trust again. I love her too much to hurt her again. Your an amazing person and I would say yes but I just cant right now. My grandfather’s in the hospital. He’s my main concern right now. I dont want to be with someone and my mother has no idea. You have to understand that my mother comes first.

5aled: Ofcourse I completley agree with what you. I understand wallah. But were still gonna be friends right ?

Me: Yeah.

5aled: *sigh* Ok good.

Me: Please dont be upset with me. I’m sorry if I hurt you.

5aled: Doody dont be sorry. Bl3ax I have so much respect for you right now. Keberti eb 3aini. Mashallah awal marah ashoof w7da zayik.

Me: Thank you.

5aled: Walaw..

And that was how I turned him down. I didnt want to, but I had to. Sometimes we have to make sacrifices for our own good. And like one thing 5aled taught me, “if something doesnt go your way it just means something better is coming your way”. I truly do believe in those words.

There was no awkwardness when we talked after what happend. We went back to normal, just being friends. It didnt effect us one bit. It was like it never happend.

On May 11… after midnight.. that’s when everything changed…

Two posts in one day.. see how much I love you all ;p

This post is dedicated to 7aWoOrY

Ive come to know her a bit and I have say Mashallah 3ala hal bnt.. a strong person whom we can all learn from her blog. It taught me so much.

This post is for you 7ubii I love you! ;**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Before you know what happend with “him” you have to know how “he” and I met.

On November in 2007 my cousin Meeny (her nickname) called me up asking me to go with her to camp in the summer of 2008. I really wanted to but knew my parents would not approve. But after hearing me out they both said ok. My mom said it was mainly in my dad’s hands not mine. W el 7mdelah my dad said ok.

I was so excited. We both were. Meeny went the year before and told me how amazing it is. She filled me in on everything and I just kept imagining myself there having fun and all that. I couldnt wait.

But then Meeny called me up in a week saying that she changed her mind, and changed her mind and said she’s not gonna go. I was shocked and devestated. Why ?! After she practicly came crawling begging me to go with her. Why??

So anyways the next day I log onto facebook and see that she’s invited me to a group called “If 100 people join this group ill come to blah blah blah”

Yes I know a very weird way of getting the “yes please come” from people.

So I accepted and saw that so far only 5 people joined. I read all the names and this one name popped out…

” 5aled Al – Flani “

His name sounded familiar.

You see when Meeny back from her first summer at camp she came back with many stories to tell. And in most of them 5aled’s name was mentioned. She told me he was a very sweet guy and they were good friends over there.

So I decided to send him a message to try and convince her to come next year. Since she talked highly of him I thought hey it’s worth a shot.

He replied back to me saying ok he’ll try. And we havent spoken until February 2008 where he sent me a message on Facebook.

I forgot all about the guy. Everything!

5aled – hey dina remember me ? :p

Me – mmmm sorry i dont.. who are you ?

5aled – ((he reminded me))

Me – ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh looool im so sorry walla i forgot :p

5aled – lol 3adi so how have you been ?

Me – tamam wallah you ?

5aled – good good.. i wanted to tell you that I talked to Meeny and she said she’s gonna go.

Me – badriiiiiiiiiiiiii its been like 2 months !

5aled – heheh (A)

Me – but too bad i wont be going ;””’(

5aled – laish !!!

Me – daddy said no.. the whole time he thought it was an all girls camp. and when he found out he went insane !

5aled – 5asara ;s

Me – i know !

After that conversation we talked about manyother stuff. He then asked for my email and I said yes. I dont know why bs art7telo.. i felt at ease talking to him so 3ala6ool I gave him my email.

We started to get close.. as friends only. We spoke chatted everyday for an hour or two. But yet we still hadn’t exchanged numbers.

He was diffirent than the rest. How could I tell by just chatting right ? Well dont ask, cause I dont know how to even explain it.

Then one day I told him I wanted to log out cause I had some stuff to do. And he told me “ok dina but if you ever need anything here’s my number”.

Strangly I didnt think aha he so wants me or yeah yeah a plan to get me to call. No. I actualy believed his intentions were good.

I kinda forgot about me saving his number and just went on with life. Haha! I forgot all about it..

Then one day I was at the salon waiting for the driver to come pick me up. And when I’m bored I hate to just sit around and stare at the floor. I have to call or text somebody. So I started scanning my phonebook until I saw his name. I was like huh when did I save his number. Then I remembered and called him right away. Just like that, without a though I pressed the call button.



Me: 5aled ?

5aled: E hallah meen ?

Me: Uhh its me Dina.

5aled: Ah hallah Dina kfk ?

Me: Good wallah you ?

5aled: Nwarti youmi wallah..

Me: Haha y3ainy 3al kthb

5aled: La wallah !

Me: Whatever..

5aled: Laish fj2a al7een tklmeeny b3d a week ?

Me: You said to call when I really needed you.

5aled: Bismilah 3leeki 5air wsh feeh ?

Me: Well now I really need you to entertain me cause I’m bored !

5aled: Hahaha !! So your using me huh ?

Me: Alright fine I’ll hang up if you want.. Bye..

5aled: LA LA !! WAIT !!

Me: Mmm hmm ?

5aled: Since you called and all stay.



We talked for 3 whole hours !! And that was just the first phone call !! :D

He was so sweet. I felt a connection with him. I was my complete self, no lies nothing. Just me.

We instintly hit it off and went on and on talking not stopping for even a minute. It was like we were the two missing pieces of a puzzel. We fit.

Though I wasnt getting my hopes up for him too high. I just wanted him as a friend. I didnt wanna jump into anything. I didnt wanna have him behind my mothers back. I mean she didnt know that me and him were friends and so I felt guilty enough. But not just guilt, I also didnt want, well I wasnt ready to have a man in my life again. I was too afraid of getting hurt again.

So I kept my distance and kept him as a friend. During a short period of time we managed to became very good friends.

I wanna tell you a little more about him.

He was tall. Beautiful mid-tone color skin. Killer brown eyes. Full lips (i kinda hate that but they all have their bad right? ;p ). Curly hair. So fit that you could hit him with a brick.

Yup I could see all this from his pictures on facebook.

I know some of you are going.. why does she always meet guys online ?

Well here in Jeddah the internet isnt the only option for us. We have so many. There are alot of mixed parties. The beach. Friends of friends. School. All of that.

But me, I rarley go to mix parties. First I’m not allowed and second I dont want to and I’m not really in the mood for mixed and all that.

Back to 5aled. He was a year older than me. Bs mashallah 3a8lo kbeer. What I hated about him though was that he was sometimes over sensitive
Those two things are what I hate most in a man !! I told myself that if anything ever happend between the two of us I would change that right away. I mean its not good for him aswell as its not good for me!

Despite the habits in him. I liked him. I liked him as a friend but deep down, way deep down inside I kinda had feelings for him. Not strong feelings, but just kinda.

He understood me.

I cant believe it, but I opend up about my past with him and he helped me and talked to me. He actualy made me forgive myself. He made me look at what happend in a good way. He told me that everything happens for a reason. He told me people make mistakes and learn from them. He told me that he thinks I’m a strong person and he admires me for it. He said so many stuff like that that really made me feel a little better.

Who knew that this guy would have such an effect on me.

5aled… ahhhhh ya 5aled !

Just please dont break my heart !

Previously on Oh Doctor, Doctor.

“Mama, I’ll talk to you later,” and she closed the phone.

“I’m really really sorry, my bad. I wasn’t watching where I was going.”

“Neither was I,” she rolled her eyes.

“Umm, excuse me?”

“Nothing,” she walked to the rubbish bin, threw the papers and simply walked away.

Wow, someones not having a good day today…he thought to himself.

—————————-

As Beethoven’s soft music played from his stereo system which could be heard all over the house; the kitchen, the bathroom, the bedrooms, everywhere, he carefully added the finishing touches to his salad.

He drizzled the olive oil and his favorite vintage Italian vinaigrette on the top and added a few pieces of fresh mint. He poured himself a glass of his favorite homemade kiwi juice and sat at the kitchen’s elegant counter top. He sprinkled some black pepper onto his dish, said the usual ‘Bismilla,” and enjoyed his meal.

During his final last bites, his BlackBerry vibrated off the ceramic counter. It was a message from his youngest sister, Nourah.

“Sckyping in five,” the message said.

When he was finally done, he got up, finished what remained from his glass of freshly done kiwi juice and dropped his plate and glass by the sink to be washed later on and headed up to his office.

He opened his MacBook Pro and opened Sckype and within a couple of minutes he was having one of their lengthily chats. She was only nineteen, the youngest of the five siblings. There was an eleven year difference between them, he was the second one. He had four brothers and Nourah was his only sister. They were the closest to each other.

“Hamad, listen, I have this essay to finish and I’ll be back on in an hour or so, wait for me?” she gave him an angelic look, “Please,” she begged him.

“Haha, yalla zain. I’ve got two scheduled surgeries tomorrow. I need my good night rest,”

“Ufff, Hmaid! Why did you have to be a doctor? Ok, fine. Be a doctor but please come back!” she convinced her brother like any other time.

“Nouro, we’ve talked about this,” he cut her short.

“7aram you keep Nouf hanging like this, it isn’t fair to her too,” she mentioned his fiancée, or ex-fiancée.

Nouf, Nouf…what can I say? he frowned.

“Shfeek Hmaido?” she saw her brother’s discomfort.

“Ma shay 7abeebty, yalla ana el7een a5aleech. Tell me how that essay comes out, ok?”

“Inshalla,”

They said their goodbye’s, closed his laptop as well as the lights to his office and headed to his room. After washing up and finally lying in the comfort of his warm bed, he closed his eyes but his mind was too full awake to drift off and switch to sleeping mode. He tried countless times but there was no such luck.

Having tried some more, he gave and sat himself up straight on the bed. He walked down the stairs to the living room and into the kitchen for a glass of milk. He put the glass down by the side of the sink and started to wash the two glasses and his plate back from dinner, hoping that he’d get weary and get some sleep.

Again, no such luck. He put the two glasses and dish into the dryer and exited, closing the kitchen lights behind him. He walked back up the stairs, both his feet dragging themselves up with each heavy step he took. He got back into bed and started searching for his novel when the letter accidentally slipped out of his bedside table.

He froze at the sight of it. He put his hand on his forehead and dug into his temples soothing his thoughts that were racing around rapidly.

Why Nouf, why? a hot tear fell down his eye.

Immediately regaining himself, he pulled the letter out and walked down and fixed himself a warm fire by the fire place in the living room and slowly unfolded the letter…

Dear Hamad,

I have wrote this letter over and over again
until I managed to get the courage to finally accept what I have
written. as you know, I’m not very good at confrontation yet informing you of
all people the news I have but it is your right to find out after you need
to know it’s not something I can keep hidden for long.

A couple of months ago I had a random check
up and the doctor has found a lump in my left breast and he had asked be for a
biopsy to make sure it’s not malignant, but the one thing I feared did
happen and it was malignant. The doctor said I have nothing to fear as the
removal of such lump is a “piece of cake”. Nonetheless, the cancer had spread
before my scheduled operation and I was diagnosed with stage 3
cancer.

I had traveled to England to see a specialist but mind
you I was in major denial due to my young age, but due to my lifestyle the
cancer has spread viciously and the doctors have concerto that there is no point
of me going through either chemotherapy or radiation.

I am given a 6 month timeline until I am admitted into
hospital for my final round with life, I know what you might tell me that
god intends our life span but at the same time god has written for me to walk
down this path.

Hamad I have not written to you for medical
advice or your opinion but I have written to inform you I want you to
move on, let me be free so I can enjoy my family and friends during the
time I have left.

I’d appreciate if this is kept to yourself as I’m not
ready to inform every one, pity is something I’m not looking for at the moment
as my strength is supplied from their normal life.

Thank you.

Nouf.

Another hot tear made it’s way down his face…

————————————-

A million thanks to Zuzzy for writing the letter, I love you.

P.S. Nawarii, where are you?

Hey everyone! So this is the new story I told you guys about. Enjoy. Oh and feedback would be more than nice. Thank you.

P.S. Thank you Zuzzy ;*
P.P.S. Nawarii, my e-mail is sunsetqtr@live.com.

———————————————–

With his Economist magazine in one hand and his suitcase in the other, he waited for his daily dose of caffeine, looking through the glass windows onto the main street. He carefully watched the snow flakes come down in pretty patterns as they landed on children’s fleece hats and warm winter pullovers as they slowly got onto their school bus, one after the other. He saw the beggars blowing into their ripped mittens in an attempt to warm their cold hands. He saw the business men walking with their black suits and coats on and their BlackBerry’s to their ears. He saw girls in their colorful winter clothing laughing along with one another.

“Another winter day in New York City,” he thought to himself.

Only one word could describe the outdoors, white. The snow kept falling from the day before, but would pause every hour or two.

“One tall cinnamon dolce latte,” called out the guy from behind the counter.

Before he left, he asked for sleeves and walked out seconds later. To most people, it would be freezing, but to him it was normal. He stopped feeling numb from the coldness after these long, long 5 years. It was something he had gotten used to.

He started walking towards his destination when his BlackBerry vibrated in his pocket. He juggled the hot drink in his other hand while trying to pull his phone out of his left pocket.

“Hello,” he answered when he crashed into a figure.

The latte came spilling down on her papers as he ended the call and apologised at once.

“Shit, I’m so sorry,” he pulled out some tissue as he offered them to her.

“I told you Mama, no means no. I’ve said that to you guys over a million times, won’t you guys just accept it,” she ignored him and kept some distance between herself and the papers in her hand in order not to stain her coat.

“Mama, I’ll talk to you later,” and she closed the phone.

“I’m really really sorry, my bad. I wasn’t watching where I was going.”

“Neither was I,” she rolled her eyes.

“Umm, excuse me?”

“Nothing,” she walked to the rubbish bin, threw the papers and simply walked away.

Wow, someones not having a good day today…he thought to himself.

Sorry for the short post. I promise a longer one tommorow ;**




Before I start telling you guys about 2008. You have to know why until this day I’m still scared. I’m scared that my old self might take controle of me again. Cause you see, I feel like it wasnt me, it was like someone else took controle of me and I just had no controle.

I kept inviting people into my life, people I barley knew. Most of them were guys. I kept them as friends. But you see, they were just too many of them. I had over 10 guys I barely knew on my facebook friends list.

I hated that so much about myself. Then one day I woke up and said “Dina what the hell are you doing?” I was kinda being a player in a way you know? I mean I talked to like 5 diffirent guys a day … I would mainly talk to them from midnight until like 4 am. I didnt know what the hell I was doing… I’m just glad its all in the past.

Also I kept jumping in and out of friendships. Many of them disappointed me. But it was my own fault. I trusted too fast. I always think the best of others.

I must remind you, this was NOT in 2008. This was in 2006-2007.

Here we go… the year of 2008.. where the new me began to bloom.

Suzy 101

I have ADD.. bs el7mdelah now it’s much more less. I’m not ashamed I mean its not like its a disability or something. Im a hundred percent healthy and again I will say ashamed.

My mom and I started to get even closer like we did before. I earned her trust back.

Oh and I’m so sorry I forgot something really important. My adorable little sister Haya. Aghh I could just eat her up!! I’m only jelouse of one thing… HER HAIR !! MASHALLAH !! She has light brown golden hair while me and the rest of my family are stuck with dark chocolate brown hair. Ok what is up with that? Yallah 3adi I dyed my hair for a 3 years and got bored of it, so now hehehehe its back natural.

Now let’s get back…

I’ve built up so much anger and hate towards myself and others. I decided to talk to a therapist. I just wanted to let it all out. Question, why is it that its easier for us to talk and to them , while our friends and family not so much ?? It’s so weird.

Another thing that helped me was writing. Whenever I felt any type of emotion I’d find a way to turn it into a peom.

I used to write song lyrics when I was thirteen until the age of fifteen but then I stopped.

Suzy 101

I sing. I actualy have a good voice. Amazing voice from what others tell me. My mom told me that whenever she’d take me to the doctor for a checkup when I was a young child he’d always say I could do very well in singing. Ma fhmt shay wallah.. bs fhmt inah he saw my throught blah blah and he said I have the chords and whatever. Lol does that make sense? :P So yeah I sing. Whenever I got a chance I would sing at parties of people I know. Until now I really love to sing. I love music, I just love it. The connection I have with it. <3

I stopped because…. actualy I dont know why I did. Guess it just happend :S

So at the start of 2008 I started writing poetry. Write now I have a huge notebook filled with my own writing. I dont just do it anymore to let out my emotions but as a hobby aswell. Sometimes I’d be sitting down doing something and then all of a sudden I would sing out a verse and then I’d take it and turn it into a poem. See when I’m really bored I just sing out random and try to put them together. So it would start out as a song then be brought down into poetry.

After a couple of therapy sessions I was all better. I forgave myself and began walking towards my future.

Just when I started getting back to my own self again.. he came into my life.

The love of my life.

The one that had me head over heels.

The one that drove me crazy half the time but still I ended up loving him.

Me!

I know, you miss me, right? ;)))

Ahahahah!

I’m finally done! Now it’s time enra7eb bl Eid break ya nass!

Kl 3am o into eb alf alffff alffff 9e7a o salama yaa raaabbbb o 3asaha etkooon mn a7laaa a3yaaadkummm :**

Love you guys ;**

P.S. I’m starting a whole new story.

P.P.S. Don’t kill me :(

P.P.P.S. Tawny raj3a mn my last final o ga3da af6er 3la egg omlette w toast ;)

Okay so am on a break now mn el derasa , w am going to write the LAST post peopleAgain am so sorry I kept you waiting all this time ! ;*To Madliar ; am so happy to know you enjoy this ! w you’re telling people to read it b3d lol that’s so cool, …

Three weeks had gone by and I guess you could say I was happy.

But then I got into this huge mess with my mom ;s

See she didnt know about Fai9al.. the only boyfriend she did know about was Ra7man, my first. She let me be with him cause she thought it would be a good experiance for me.

As for Fai9al.. she was cluless cause I knew she’d dissapprove.

But later on she found out and swiped my phone away.

Thank god when she asked for it, it was in my room. She asked me to go get it so I did.. I was so scared I didn’t wanna upset her even more. So I ran straight to my room, got a paper and pen, and started writing down all the important numbers.

And for the next month and a half this was how it was. I was only allowed to use the house phone , but only when I got my mothers permission. I remember when I was with my friends I would beg to use their phones for a while to call Fai9al. And late at night I wouls sneak out my bedroom window ((we had a one story house)) and run over to our 5aima where there was a telephone that I’d use. Every one would be asleep by 3 so I would sneak off at around 4.

I hated doing this but I had no other option.

During that time aslo I had about 7 gy friends that I would just talk to for fun. But there was only one that I didn’t really use, he was 3bdulah. He was truly my best friend.

He knew all there was to know about me. He accepted me for for who I was and didnt judge me. He stood beside me and was there for me.

My girlfriends came and gone but he didnt. I truly did care for him.. I loved him. He’s like the brother I never had.

Me and him have so much in common its like we never get bored of one another, we always had something to talk about. We laughed and just enjoyed eachothers company.

Oh and I have to tell you this !! Every single time he has to bring this one specific thing up.

At like 4 am I was online and my internet all of a sudden broke down on me so I called him up..

3bdulah: Mmmm? *sleepy voice*

Me: Hey you!

3bdulah: Doody do you know what time it is ?

Me: Yeah 4.

3bdulah: Mashallah 3leeki ..

Me: Hehe listen I need you to do me a favor..

3bdulah: I have an exam tommorow cant this wait ?

Me: NO NOW !

3bdulah: Habla.. wallah inik habla..

See the thing about me and 3bdulah is that no one can ever and i mean EVER NEVER understand our friendship. Other than our nicknames we call eachother ((Doody and Boodi)) I would call him ’3abi and he would call me habla. LOL I dont know how this all became but it did. :P

And guess what ?

He actualy got up even thogh he had an exam the next day and logged on to my facebook to finish up something I was doing. SO SWEET !

MY BROTHER <3

Anyways back to Fai9al…

I herd from a source that he was trying to date this other girl.. I forgot her name. I honestly didnt belieev it at first. But the girl herself talked to me and said that he really was trying to get with her and that I should back away from him before he hurts me.

When I aksed Fai9al about it, he told me that it was a long time ago. :s

But this girl told me it was just recent.

I was so confused and couldnt take all the rumors anymore so I ended things with him. He tried calling but I wouldnt answer. He texted but I wouldnt reply.

He kept trying to contact me for about a week. So I finaly gave in and herd what he had to say.

Fai9al: I’m so sorry you had to hear all that stuff about me. You have to know that I love and care about you and would never want to hurt you. Yes I was a player and I used to not give a shit about any girl but you… your diffirent Dina. You changed me. You made me want to have a relationship and give myself a chance. Please give me one more chance to prove myself to you.

Dina: Fai9al I really dunno. I mean the rumors are constantly on and off. How long will this go on for ? I dont wanna have a boyfriend and keep hearing this heartbreaking rumors about him. Its hard and I get effected so much.

Fai9al: I know, I know wallah. Let me handel that ok? I’ll take care of everything just please take me back. Im begging you.

You all know what I did right? Yup, I gave in.

But a month after that, we broke up. I broke up with him. Sure he said he loved me but I just didnt feel it you know? There’s a diffirence between showing the love and saying I love you. A huge diffirence.

I just wanted to me alone for a while. I mean that year I was ina nd out of relationships I just needed to be alone you know? I wanted to find myself again. Because that year I lost myself.

My best friend abandoned me. Two guys broke my heart. And I risked my relationship with my mother for a guy.

Thank god my mom forgave me and gave me back my phone. You wanna know how ?

Mama: 7beebty ana w e5tik ry7een are you sure you dont wanna come with us ?

Dina: E mama you go have fun ana abadan mali 5ulg.

Mama: Ok I love you w entabhy 3ala nafsik.

Dina: WAIT !

Mama: Na3am ?

Dina: How am I gonna be able to take care of myself without a mobile? I mean think about ti for a minute. What if a burgalar comes and starts chasing me around!! I mean do you really think I’d have time to tell him to pause for a minute to use the house phone and call the police!! hell no!! But you see while im running I could easily pull out my mobile and dial the police.

She smiled the kinda smile that you wanna smile but try to hold it in but cant. Huh.. did I even make any sense… Oh well :P

>>> 2008 <<<

This is where the new me started to bloom.
At the end of 2007 I broke it off will all my “fake” guy friends except for Boodi. :)

I pulled myself together and promised to never lie to my mom again. To never hurt anyone (although I havent). To never give in to something so wrong. To never lose myself again. I promised to never let a man take controle over me and to never bring the horrible me back ever again.

2008…

Click On Image to Enlarge:yany email sidamny;p awalan… ALGHAW 3ITHWEEETY IB MONTADAYAT TA3ABT GALBY!!!!!!!!! takhayilaaw!! laghooooohhha!!!thaniyan… ANA 3ITHWA IB MONTADAYAT TA3ABT GALBY! :P makent adre;pla w 3ithwa mostahdafa ba3ad;p yabon ibogon …

My Pretties I’m so so sorry!

I woke up 3 days ago and wanted to log on when the speedtouch connection was disabled. So I had to wait 2 days for this guy to come and fix the wires all over the house. I was dying I mean who here cannot live without atleast 5 minutes of internet time ???

No worries now, I’m back! :D

And I’ve got a long post for you all. And to just reply back to some comments…

Anonymouse 7beebty I’m so glad to know their are other Saudi bloggers out there since I mostley follow Kuwaiti’s. LOL yeah I’m from Kuwait bs still I live here in KSA so knowing I’m not the only one .. yeah I guess it kinda does make it more exciting :D


7aWoOrY Ya galbiiiiiii I’m thrilled that your impressed aghh i love you! And yes please I would reallyyyyyyyyyyyyyy love it if you would check out the rest. Start from “Trapped”. And about that rude comment.. pshhhh I ont care.. “you can talk what you want but my skin is really thick…” 3ala gol Kat DeLuna ;p muwaaaaaa7 !!


3abeer;* Yup I still live here. Haha dont worry I got in ever word you said, and hmm what a coincidence ;* Thank you so much I really apprecaite all the support 7ayatiii !


Just-a-Teenager Yay :D


Comatose I know what you mean.. Riyadh ;s I go there every now and then for breaks cause most of my cousins are there and aghhhh katmaaaa.. everywhere I go its like people are watching you.. your every move. I feel like I can never just be my self and relax. el 3ax hina f jeddah.. its more free and you can do whatever you want! Let’s change that and make u a NON silen reader.. what do ya say ? ;p And thank’s for the back up love ;**


Bella_x0x0 7ayati !! As I wrote above the internet wasnt woring for 3 straight days ;( y7belik la 5afeen 3alay Im perfectley fine ;** And hahahahha she didnt scare me off.. i dont scare that easy ;) Im here and always will be.. Love u !



ENJOY !!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Surprisingly I moved on in less than a minute.

Not long after that I got a random add and inbox from this guy on Facebook. (( Before the summer I deleted my netlog account and made an account on Facebook ))One hell of a bumpy road with this guy

*siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh*



Fai9al:

hey :D sorry for this fj2a random add but this is facebook after all right ?


Me:

hallah.. yeah i guess it is heheh ;p


Fai9al:

so how are you ?


Me:

good good, yourself ?


Fai9al:

gr8 thanx :) so dina… what do you say we move this conversation onto msn ?


Me:

LOL first of all we haven’t even started a comversation yet, and second i dont think were at that level where i trust you enough to give my email.


Fai9al:

a tough one i see.. i like that. no worries. whatever you say..



We started sending eachother messages on facebook for about two weeks until I felt it was ok for me to give him my email. So I did and we “moved our conversation” onto msn.

It was an all clean chat between us for a couple of days. Then he wanted more.

Fai9al:

dina…


Me:

yeah ?


Fai9al:

i wanna see you ?


Me:

oh ?


Fai9al:

do you mind ?


Me:

ummm… i dunno fai9al


Fai9al:

listen how about you give me your number and i call you, and……….. if you dont like me in 5 minutes feel free to erase me from your life.


Me:

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm…….


Fai9al:

(A) (A) (A)


Me:

oh ok fine.. it wont kill me.


Fai9al:

i wont let anything kill you!! bsmilah 3laik !


Me:

looooool yallah i gotta go.. here my number ********** call me later. bbye!


Fai9al:

:D




He called me that night and we spent over 2 hours talking and just getting to know eachother. After 2 days of late night chit chats he asked me out, and I accepted.

He took me to this cafe called Senses. It was amazing, the cafe I mean. What I loved about it was that you could sit inside the walls , you know what I mean ? Like if two people for example wanted a bit of privacy they would sit there. There would be a table and mini couch inside the wall. Aghh I dunno how to explain. But some of you got it right ?

Almhm… so I saw him there and it was awkward. I was so shy and he was too. We could not have been any more far apart. He was all the way on the other end of the couch as I was too.

In that one hour we spent together it was absolute SILENCE !!

I kept looking down playing around with my finger nails and he kept playing around with his phone !! RUDE !! Who the hell was he texting? Some other girl to have an after party with .. hmmmmmm ?!

BADRIIIIIIIIIII !! In the last few minutes before I had to go, he came closer to me and held my hand. My heart started racing. I couldnt tell if it was racing because I liked him or if it was because I was scared.

He let out a smile and squeezed my hand even tighter. But I have to say… it did kinda feel nice. I had this feeling that he did care about me. Although I still had my doubts, I mean after what my ex did to me… do you blame me ?

Our night ended with him giving me a gentle kiss on my cheeck. I blushed right away, but walked away before he could see me.

Why is it that everytime your out with a guy it starts off really weird and awkward and then in those last minutes it all starts to turn around ? It’s seriously unfair !

But I didn’t have to worry cause I knew this was not our final date. I could see it in his eyes that he liked me, really liked me.

I actualy herd some stuff about him. Before I accepted to go out with him I asked around and most people said that he’s a player and usualy leavs a girl heartbroken. I couldnt believe that.. he was so sweet and nice to me. They also said he eases into it all. Acts like the man the ladies want him to be then BAM he’s in and gets what he wants. I dont know if they ment physically.. well I dont think they did since he never tried anything with me.

We continued seeing eachother every weekend. I have to say it was fun. I mean he made me feel special, showering me with compliments. What really made me melt is his way of charm. He really does know how to charm a girl and make her all giggily inside.

But… what I didnt know is that later on… a77m a77m well still theres alot to talk about before I finish that sentence.